“Surrender becomes so much easier when you realize the fleeting nature of all experiences and that the world cannot give you anything of lasting value. You then continue to meet people, to be involved in experiences and activities, but without the wants and fears of the egoic self. That is to say, you no longer demand that a situation, person, place, or event should satisfy you or make you happy. Its passing and imperfect nature is allowed to be.
And the miracle is that when you are no longer placing an impossible demand on it, every situation, person, place, or event becomes not only satisfying but also more harmonious, more peaceful.
When you completely accept this moment, when you no longer argue with what is, the compulsion to think lessens and is replaced by an alert stillness. You are fully conscious, yet the mind is not labeling this moment in any way. This state of inner nonresistance opens you to the unconditioned consciousness that is infinitely greater than the human mind. This vast intelligence can then express itself through you and assist you, both from within and from without. That is why, by letting go of inner resistance, you often find circumstances change for the better.”
~ Eckhart Tolle
100 Days of Writing – Day Sixteen
“The eyes of others are our prisons; their thoughts our cages.” –
Virginia Woolf — What does this quote mean to you?
One of the common thoughts we all have in life is to be looked upon as favorably by others. For many, self-esteem is directly tied to what perception others have of us,,,,at least what we think they feel about us.
As I have gotten older, it would seem that I care a lot less about what others think or say about me. I’ve gotten to know myself a lot better and my personal thoughts of self are much more important.
Indeed, if I look at the term “self-esteem,” it really has nothing to do with what others might think about me. I’ve heard it said many times, “What other people think of me is none of my business.” They are perfectly free to think what they may, whether it be good or bad.
I can look at my own perceptions of other people in my life and realize that I may not know them as well as I think I do. I don’t comprehend or understand their motives for why they do what they do. To think I know someone else that well is folly.
Just for today, I’ll set aside any wonder or worry about what others think of me. I’ll do my best at what’s set in front of me and let my words and deeds speak for themselves.
100 Days of Writing – Day Fifteen
“She stood in the storm and when the wind did not blow her way, she adjusted her sails.” – Elizabeth Edwards
What does this quote mean to you?
In looking at this quote, I am reminded that storms are a part of life. Life can tend to get “lifey” and we sometimes find ourselves in the midst of situations in which we don’t know exactly what to do or say. It’s during these times that our true character is formed. It’s during such tumultuous times that we realize our true natures.
We are in a world where things are constantly changing and many times we can be caught offguard with the unexpected events it brings forth. When the changes are less-desireable, we can tend to be filled with anxious thoughts and be left wondering what to do, which way to turn.
I have found that in many situations, I have little or no control over the circumstances that surround me. In such cases, it’s not so much what needs to be changed with the external circumstances as in me and my attitude. My perspective may need to be altered and my course of action changed from what I originally had planned. It could be that I need to reach out for help from someone with more experience.
Above all else, I need to avoid panicking. This will lead to only more fear and distress. As a person of faith, I will often pray to the God of my understanding for guidance, wisdom, and strength for whatever the situation might be.
100 Days of Writing – Day Fourteen
My try at poetry – Based on inspiration from Isaiah 40:31 and a hawk I saw flying through the sky on two seperate occasions.
Hawk flying so high above my head,
Floating effortlessly, wings outspread.
Moving to and fro with the winds that day,
Never doubting its heights to achieve.
Searching the firmament below,
Such an amazing view to behold.
The hawk flying so high above my head,
Floating effortlessly, wings outspread.
100 Days of Writing – Day Thirteen
“The quieter you become, the more you can hear.” (Baba Ram Dass)
What does this quote mean to you?
For the most part, I tend to be a rather quiet person. Some find this to be unusual for someone who’s spent his life as a teacher. But more times than not, I tend to be quiet. I have found you can learn a lot more from listening to others than you can from feeling the need to always be talking.
I have found that if I’m quiet, whether in the presence of others or not, I tend to be more introspective. When I was growing up, I would take a tape recorder with me when I went riding my bike and record all the surrounding sounds. When I returned home, I would play the tape back and be amazed at all the sounds in my presence of which I was not aware.
For most of my life, I have had tinnitus, a constant ringing in my ears. While it’s something that you eventually get used to, it does keep you from having a full range of hearing. This is another reason I try to listen more closely to those sounds around me, whether it’s a person conversing or the multitude of sounds that nature has to offer.
Perhaps the most challenging listening I’ve had to learn to do is when in conversation with others. My Attention Deficit Disorder creates situations where my mind wanders when talking with people. So I have to make a concerted effort to focus on the content of what’s being shared so as not to appear rude. This can be especially difficult when the person I’m talking to is rather long-winded or is talking about things of which I have little or no interest.
For today, let me be a good listener. Let me be reminded there’s a good reason why I have two ears and only one mouth. Let me fully experience life and all the myriad of sounds it has to offer.
100 Days of Writing – Day Twelve
Why do I write?
I started writing nearly twenty years ago in the first days of recovery. It was suggested by a therapist I was seeing at the time.
I purchased a small journal and started writing and have written most every day since that time.
I see writing as a form of therapy
I take my thoughts and feelings, as well as the words of others, and put them on pages of my journal. I have filled hundreds of volumes in all these years of writing. It is so very helpful to put all those thoughts out of my mind and onto paper. I highly recommend it to anyone just starting as recovery as a log of where they are and hopefully one day will be.
I write because it gives me a sense of security
I take a journal with me wherever I go and I feel somewhat out-of-sorts if I don’t have it. I’m able to stop at any place, at any time, and put pen to paper. It offers a sense of relief.
I write because it helps me to remember what I’ve been through in life
I always put the date, day of the week, time, and location to start each day’s entry. Subsequent entries for that day contain just the time and location. I can read back days, weeks, months, or years later to see where I was, what I was doing, and perhaps most important, my way of thinking at that particular point in time. Perhaps at some point others will read my writing (when it’s legible, that is) and be able to tell what my life was like.
These are just a few reasons that I write. I only wish I had started this helpful habit sooner in life.
100 Days of Writing – Day Eleven
“You are not a drop in the ocean. You are an entire ocean in a drop”
What does this quote mean to you?
We are but an infinitesimally small part of the “big blue marble” we call Earth. Indeed, when viewed from the perspective of the entire universe, Earth itself seems inconsequential. So how are we, as humans, supposed to consider ourselves as an entire ocean in a drop?
I have heard the phrase “I may not be much, but I’m all I ever think about.” All the while, those voices in our heads are giving commentary on what’s going on in the world around us. But those “voices” are not who we actually are. They’re a compilation of viewpoints that come from our previous experiences and the knowledge we’ve gained on our path. In the words of author Michael Singer, we’re actually the ones who are listening to all those voices.
While my contributions to the world at large may be limited, I know that I have added to the lives of the limited number of people I know. Whether this has had a lasting effect on them, I cannot tell you. But especially in my job as a classroom teacher, I’ve tried to instill a love of learning and worthwhile character in each of my students. Some of those efforts have been more successful than others. But I’m hoping that at least some of my former students have achieved success because of something they learned while in my classroom.
I don’t think we can compare what we’ve achieved in life in comparison with others. While there are those who receive more notoriety and achieved more in practical terms, we all have our parts to play in the whole of it. There are many moving parts that make up complicated machines and the Earth is no different. It takes many of us working together to get anything accomplished.
I don’t know that this completely answers the question at hand, but it’s what comes to mind at this point in time.
Until we meet again, press forward!
Random Writing – Fear, the evil and corroding thread
Fear has been called “the evil and corroding thread that weaves its way through the very fabric of our existence.” (1) . That certainly has been and can be the case with me.
I went through a particularly tumultuous time in my life and would find myself awaking each morning in terror and dread, filled with fear. Fear of what might occur on any given day clouded my first thoughts upon waking.
I didn’t understand why this was happening, for I had been asleep until that point. I even developed resentment against God in the process, for in working a twelve-step program, I had prayed that my fears would be removed. Yet, most mornings they were still rearing their ugly heads and begging for my attention.
It’s hard to describe exactly what fear feels like. It’s a deep-seated feeling that something awful is going to happen and there’s nothing that I can do to keep it from occurring. These “worst-case scenarios” would twist and turn in my mind and in turn, creating an even higher level of anxiety.
The first thought in contemplating any action regarding the fears was to run and hide. Anything to keep from having to face the dreaded situation. But then there was the realization that fleeing from fearful thoughts many times just increased their power over me.
I’ve also realized that fear and the anxious thoughts that can cloud my mind are never totally going to exit my mind’s way of processing life.
I’ve learned to move forward with courage, knowing that life is most of the time unpredictable and that most fears I’ve played out in my mind never actually transpired as I may have supposed.
If the fears actually come to fruition, as they sometimes will, I will be able to handle those situations the best I can.
(1) The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous
100 Days of Writing – Day Ten
Get Up and Go
What gives you purpose? Do you have a dream or passion that you share with others?
I don’t have to ponder too long to answer the question about what gives my life purpose. For the past forty-one years, including twelve after my “retirement,” I have been a classroom teacher.
Each assignment I’ve been placed in has given me an opportunity to practice what I love most – teaching.
Whether the subject matter is math or science, drama or language arts, I feel like I’m having a positive influence on the students I teach and that gives my life purpose. It also happens to be what I’m most passionate about. I truly feel at home in the classroom.
And while I hope I do an adequate job of helping them learn the subjects matter at hand, I think my true purpose goes far beyond that.
I hope that…..
- my off-brand sense of humor makes their days a bit brighter and brings laughter into their lives.
- my acceptance of students from diverse backgrounds helps them to be more accepting of those who are different.
- making the subject matter relevant to their daily lives causes them to look for connections with what we’re learning in the classroom and the outside world.
- my caring attitude, even when there are undesired behaviors, teaches them the practice and attitude to become productive citizens one day.
- when they say that Mr. Moser was one of their teachers, they’re able to smile and have fond memories.
And that is what gives my life purpose.
100 Days of Writing – Day Nine
A Place in History
What historical event or contexts – way back in time or more recently – have affected you individually or as a family?
I would have to say that the coronavirus pandemic has had a huge effect on me individually, on my family, and on society as a whole. Little did we realize in March of 2020 how our world was getting ready to change.
The virus at first was something that we heard about happening in “other places.” China and countries across the big pond seem to be most affected. Then we heard of cases in the United States, but those seemed to be confined to New York and other northern states.
Eventually, cases made their way to North Carolina, but still, even then, it seemed so far away. When the governor said we would be taking a break from schools on March 13th, it began to ring a more serious note.
Then there was the lockdown. Living on my own at the time, I wondered how and if it would directly affect me. That question was soon answered, as I went for days at a time without seeing anyone in person. When cases started showing up in the county and city I live in, it really began to hit home. Then there were people that I knew who contracted the virus. And the eventual people I knew had actually died as a direct result of contracting the virus. It truly had hit home in a seemingly short period of time.
I always thought I knew what it was like to be isolated and alone. But when you’re not able even to go to your favorite cafe’ to be around others, it really has a huge effect. I never knew how much I depended on being around others, whether I knew them or not. And perhaps most noticeable of all, the traditional family Sunday dinners we had always had were discontinued. We attempted to do video conferences and get-togethers using various platforms, but it never was quite the same.
I think fear played a large part in many people’s lives, including my own. Fear that somehow we’d contract the virus or perhaps unknowingly pass it along to someone else. Masks had become a part of everyday life and even those didn’t seem to prevent some from contracting covid. Vaccines would become available months down the road and even then, there were no guarantees of immunity.
Our lives had definitely changed. Things that we had taken for granted became more cherished, especially time with friends and family. Things would eventually return to normal in some respects, but in many ways our lives had changed forever. I’ve got a lot more to say on this topic, but for now, that’s it.
David Lee 