In a get-together of like-minded friends, we discussed resentment and the power it can have in all of our lives. And perhaps most importantly, how to rid ourselves of it.
Resentment is a feeling most all of us have had at some point-in-time,,,,or perhaps at many points in time. Someone has done something “to us,” or at least that’s our take on all of it. We then will continue to mull over the situation, asking ourselves why someone would do that to us and perhaps even plot on some type of revenge. But we can soon find out that all those ways of thinking can be a big waste of time.
When we are resentful against someone, we perceive that they should have done what they did. We calculate that we’ve been irreparably harmed in some way. We often times begin to feel sorry for ourselves.
In my way of thinking, people do their best at any point in their lives. Many times they don’t realize the effects that their choices and behaviors can have on others. As a result, sometimes other people can get hurt. The other person may not realize that they’ve hurt someone else, but the fact remains that something they’ve done or said has caused harm to someone.
I have learned through multiple experiences that holding resentment against someone is a huge waste of time. Resentments deal with something that has occurred in the past and of course, the past cannot be changed. To hold a grudge means that we’re living in the past, a past that is only lingering on because we’ve chosen not to give it up. It keeps us from living in the present moment and enjoying the lives we do have.
In the Bible, it tells us in Luke 23:34 that Jesus forgave those who were crucifying him with the words “Father, please forgive them, for they know not what they do.” I try to remember this when my mind wants to continue to be resentful against someone. I also remind myself that if I was in that same situation they found themselves, I might have done much the same, or worse.
Just for today, let me let go of those resentments that I have and lead a more fully-present life.