Navigating Dating Websites…

In an effort to try to find someone to meet in the realm of dating and such, I’m giving another trying to a dating website. I’ve tried several in the seventeen-plus years I’ve been divorced and in fact got my first post-marriage date on one. But by virtue of the fact I’m still single, let’s just say they haven’t worked as well as I might have liked. Given my current status and realizing I had to put forth some effort, I’ve gotten a paid membership on Match.com. In the short period of time I’ve been on there, I have remembered some of the ins and outs of internet dating.

  • Dating websites definitely have an upside- you have a chance to meet people you wouldn’t ordinarily have an opportunity to meet. You are also “available” 24/7 to anyone who might be in the market. The one downside that I’ve noticed in this realm is that many of the potential dates are farther away than either of us would be willing to travel.
  • Dating websites contain a lot of profiles of users, including those who don’t have paid memberships and can’t really communicate with you. There are also those who completed a profile and are no longer visiting the site. I supposed they didn’t have much luck and had forgotten to hide or delete their profiles. I believe those people still show up in your searches and attempting to communicate with them, of course, is fruitless.
  • Most of the people I have an interest in initially don’t seem to have an interest in me….Most of the people who express an interest in me, I’m not having the mutual feeling.
  • If you do find someone who communicates, it’s usually very slow and cumbersome. You both have to be on the site at the same time to have anything close to a meaningful conversation. And I’ve also learned that most women aren’t willing to share their phone numbers to make communication easier. I understand why they might be hesitant to do so, but still….
  • I think some of those on the sites aren’t really all that interested in actually meeting someone and get together. Perhaps they’re just doing it to have something to do, I’m not sure.
  • My chances of meeting someone to get together with or ever having a chance to get to know on a more personal level seems to be slim. The pandemic doesn’t make things any easier. Usually the conversation in emails last for several days and then dies out because of lack of interest. I try to be a frequent communicator, but when the responses are slow to come about, my interest starts to wane.

I have a membership of several months and will make use of it, but am realistic and know that nothing meaningful might come from it. I am sincerely hoping I’m wrong, but I don’t think so at this point.

And then again, “the one” might just be on those pages of pictures I look at and we just haven’t found each other yet…one can only hope.

David Lee

Published by David Lee Moser

I am a sixty year old semi-retired elementary science teacher.

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