People who are controlling can only be that way if they are in relationship with someone who is adaptive. If someone stands up to them and is honest about his or her wants and desires, then the controlling person has to learn to share or gets frustrated and goes away. Take these steps to avoid ending up in relationships that attract unhealthy people:
• Be honest about your preferences and desires.
• Don’t act like you like things other people like just so that you will be accepted.
• Being liked for who you are requires that you be that person.
• When you give or serve, let it be honest and purposeful.
You are a person, and you cannot go throughout life without pursuing your own wishes, needs, and desires, nor should you. Your needs and desires are going to come out, and you had better find out early in a relationship where the person really stands with the idea of sometimes having to adapt to them. – Dr. Henry Cloud